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A Communication Framework

Aristotle’s Rhetorical Appeals

Ethos: Credibility in Giving the Message

  • Who are you?
  • What is your credibility?
  • Why should someone listen to you?

Pathos: Why Should I Care?

  • What does that mean to me?
  • Why should I care?
  • How will you connect with me emotionally?
  • How do you make your message important to me?

Logos: How Will You Make Me Understand?

  • What method are you using to communicate?
  • What channels and means will help me understand?

The Communication Process

Deliverer → Distractions/Distortions → Receiver(s)

All communication fits into this simple model. As effective communicators, we must deal with:

  • Distractions
  • Distortions
  • Cultural boundaries
  • Any obstacle standing between our message and the receiver’s understanding.

Channel Richness

  • A report is low on channel richness.
  • Memos, instant messages, etc., move along the continuum.
  • Face-to-face communication is the richest channel.

Levels of Communication

Level 1: The Social Level

  • Small talk: weather, sports, news.
  • Superficial but essential for building social bridges.

Level 2: The Mental Level

  • Ideas, facts, strategies, tips.
  • Common in professional environments.
  • Conversations can easily move between levels 1 and 2.

The Deep Levels of Communication

Level 3: The Emotional Level

  • Discusses wants, needs, fears, joys.
  • Root of Pathos.

Level 4: The Spiritual Level

  • Rare, profound connection without ego or game.
  • Requires trust, time, and intention.
  • Represents pure communication.

Communication Styles

Receiver Preferences

  • Written vs. Discussion
    • Written: prefer to read in advance.
    • Discussion: prefer live conversations.

Perspectives

  • Detailed vs. High-Level
    • Detailed thinkers need full context.
    • High-level thinkers want key points first.

Frequency

  • Understand how often the receiver wants updates.
  • Match communication frequency and style accordingly.

Formality

  • Formal: Face-to-face + follow-up in writing or by phone.
  • Informal: Memos, personal letters, informal updates.

Example: Detailed written quarterly report vs. weekly face-to-face update.


Types of Decision Makers

Charismatics

  • Love new ideas and thinking.
  • Balance facts with emotion.
  • Appeal to both head and heart.

Thinkers

  • Want well-supported, data-driven arguments.
  • Prefer time and multiple presentations.

Skeptics

  • Suspicious of new ideas.
  • Often challenge new models.
  • Provide data that questions their assumptions.

Followers

  • Rely on social proof.
  • Need to know others have already succeeded.
  • Name competitors, experts, or case studies.

Controllers

  • All about facts and data.
  • No emotional investment.
  • Dislike uncertainty.

Elements of a Strategic Conversation

Intention

  • What impact do you want?
  • What message should the receiver take away?

Open Communication

  • Know your information.
  • Share to build credibility.

Effective Listening

  • Listen loudly—focus entirely on the receiver.
  • Understand whether your message is being received.

Discernment

  • Ensure proper judgment and perception of your message.

Dialogue vs. Discussion

  • Dialogue: Shared vision, emotional connection.
  • Discussion: More like debate.

Body Language

  • Align your body language with your message.

Communication Toolbox

Sharing Credit

  • Credit others to build goodwill and humility.

Conversational Rituals

  • Appropriate pleasantries before business.

Feedback

  • Give negative feedback privately.
  • Focus on data, facts, and solutions.

Compliments

  • Give sincere compliments, not flattery.

Personal Authority

  • Use tone, structure, and formality to assert authority when needed.

Speaking Style

  • Shape perception through your tone and delivery.

Listening Loudly

  • Read between the lines.
  • Be present and note key points to follow up later.

Ask Open-Ended Questions

  • Encourage exploration of thoughts and feelings.

Move from Head to Heart

  • Transition from facts to emotional resonance.

Power of Silence

  • Use silence to allow deep thought.
  • Don’t rush to fill pauses.

When Silence is Destructive

  • Don’t withhold answers when you have them.

Being Authentic

  • Don’t perform—be real.
  • Share from your perspective.
  • Express emotion, passion, and personal experience.

Storytelling

  • Turn facts into engaging narratives.
  • Avoid rumors—they are negative stories.